Friday, 6 March 2015

Laos, in particular Luang Prabang

Leaving Chiang Mai was similar to leaving Hong Kong, I found a city that I felt at home in but wasn’t sad as I knew this would not be the last time I would be here.

The flight from Chiang Mai to Luang Prabang was on a tiny prop plane, which was less than half way full and so bounced about in the sky for its hour duration. It was an experience but not a particularly enjoyable one. We landed in Luang Prabang about a couple of hours before sunset and the temperature outside was deceptively cool. We sorted our visas, collected our bags and made our way to an ATM.

The currency in Laos, aside from US Dollars is the Laotian Kip. I knew that I’d be dealing with big numbers but wasn’t prepared for the options on the screen of the cash machine. Instead of the usual 10,20,50 you might see at home I was faced with options of 100,000, 250,000 and even 1,000,000. ATM’s have a time limit on them and getting to the withdrawal page can often be a lengthy process so I was trying to quickly decipher what would be a sensible amount and what would bankrupt me. I hit the 500,000 button and out poured a trees worth of paper.

We queued up at the taxi rank, handed over our destination and paid the 50,000 fare. I had absolutely no idea how much I had taken out of the cash machine and even less idea how much I’d just paid to get to the hotel. At time of writing 10,000 kip equates to £0.80p, I’m hopeless at maths and so got even more lost when trying to work it out in my head.

Our taxi pulled up and the 8 or so people waiting clambered in. I’d read nonstop reports of how bad the roads are here, nothing but dirt tracks and pot holes so you can imagine my surprise and delight when we get out onto the smooth tarmac, roads far superior to those back home. 20 minutes past without even the slightest of bumps. The taxi then turned following signs to the town and here the road ran out- literally. In front of us workmen were busy laying the road, their diggers and lorries creeping along beside them. The taxi pulled over and gestured to one couple that their hotel was “just over there”. It took a moment for this to register with them. Everyone else in the taxi breathed a sigh of relief. “Over there”, meant navigating piles of rubble, heavy machinery and a three foot deep ditch running the full length of one side of the road. The couple were easily in their 60s and both had large rucksacks, front and back. Everyone wished them luck.

The next leg of the journey was somewhat slower and less comfortable. The majority was spent behind a bulldozer as it smoothed out a rough path for us until we returned back to a more recognisable road. We scrapped past the bulldozer and continued on further into town. Again, the driver pulled over and pointed, “Cold River- that way, can’t go any further”. Although this sounded ominous it was more to do with the narrow side street than the state of the path. We walked to 50m to our guesthouse and were greeted by a friendly and welcoming face, a speedy check in and we were here.

By the time we stepped out onto the streets the sun was setting. The deep orange and black sky silhouetted the rows of palm trees, and as I sat in a local restaurant sipping on an ice cold Beerlao and enjoying a rather spicy bowl of Tom Yum I felt very much at peace.

Before deciding to go travelling I knew nothing of Laos (pronounced like cow not mouse), if I ever heard it mentioned I assumed that it was part of Thailand. But as the trip got closer I made a concerted effort to familiarise myself with this lesser known gem of a country. Laos, for the benefit of those who don’t know is a landlocked country sandwiched between China, Myanmar (Burma), Thailand, Vietnam and Cambodia. Laos is about the same size as the UK but with a population of just 6.7 million as opposed to 65 million, so there is plenty of space to stretch out. It has suffered heavy bombing from America in what is known as “The Secret War”. It was bombed for two main reasons, firstly to prevent people from moving freely between the top and bottom of Vietnam during the war and secondly to eradicate Communism. I once read a horrifying statistic that the number of bombs dropped equated to a plane load, every 8 minutes, 24 hours a day for 9 years. This makes Laos the most heavily bombed country per capita in history. Up to a third of the bombs dropped did not explode and to this day continue to kill innocent people. Some 200,000 people, 40% of whom are children have been killed by UXO (Unexploded Ordnance) since the bombings finished some 40 years ago. America spent more in three days of bomb attacks than it has in its 16 year clean-up operation ($52 million). Laos is still a communist country.

But despite its recent and traumatic history Laos is by far the most peaceful, welcoming and beautiful country I have ever visited. There is little sign of the impact of this war, at least here in Luang Prabang with the exception of all the plant pots and barbeques made from bomb shells that line the streets…

Luang Prabang has two rivers running either side of its main road. The first and most famous is the Mekong and the second is the Nam Khan. Walking along the latter the following morning I got to experience the true temperature of Laos, a chilling 39 degrees. Somehow though this temperature felt manageable, perhaps it was the lower humidity compared to parts of Thailand or faint breeze coming off the water. Whatever it was I felt comfortable walking around.

The pace of life here is very laid back, uber-relaxed. Nobody is rushing or pushing, the cars are not speeding or beeping their horns. It is calm and perfectly quiet. Unlike sleepy towns such as Ayutthaya where its quietness was a result of its inactivity, Luang Prabang is full of life, coffee shops are buzzing with people, children are swimming in the river and markets are in full swing but somehow everything is still.

We work our way down to a bamboo bridge which joins the river from the main town to a local village. The bridge is like something built in a Top Gear special. Once our feet were on firmer ground we were able to enjoy the spectacular view. The sun was beating down on the fast flowing river, mountains reflected in the golden shimmers of the water. The skyline is phenomenal, the dense mountain ranges vanishing into the distance become like clouds in the otherwise clear blue sky. Around me is thick, green vegetation and the sound of birds, insects and the unmistakable “daa-ka” of the gecko. It’s hard to want to do much else than lay here and let it all go on around you. It’s at this point I understand why the Laos visa only lasts for 15 days, any longer and you would reach a state of chilled so deep that you would no longer be able to function. As I write this, almost a week on I am slumped in a coffee shop barely able to lift my own head, the fact that I am typing makes me seem like an Olympic athlete compared to those around me but I am little more than a brain in a jar in my current state.

We manage to get up from the river side bench and make a short assent into the village behind us. The heat has been affecting Hatty all morning and this climb was the nail in the coffin for her, she looks like she could faint at any moment and so we cut short our trip to the unknown and head back across the bridge. She tops up on fluids and retires back to the room. Somehow the heat still isn’t an issue for me so I make my way into the busier streets on Luang Prabang on my own.

The main road, Sisavangvong comprises of handicraft shops, massage parlours, coffee shops,  tour operators, bike hire and money exchanges in an almost uniform fashion. Although almost everything on this road exists for the tourists it doesn’t feel forced like Bangkok’s’ KhaoSan Rd. This may be partly due the fact that old town Luang Prabang is a UNESCO world heritage site and so all the architecture has been preserved and protected. Although the contents might not be, the buildings themselves are 100% authentic so you never forget you’re in Laos. The architecture itself is heavily influenced by the cities time under French rule, a heritage kept alive today mostly through the high volume of bakeries.

I wander the streets with no real aim, simply enjoying being in this most easy going Asian city. I find a coffee shop playing Laotian dub music and perch myself on at a street side table, I order a coffee and settle into my chair. A topless local man appears and staggers over to me, he has a small bunch of plants and flowers which he places on my table, pauses and then offers me his smoking pipe. Judging my his euphoric state and vacant stare I am led to believe it wasn’t tobacco in his pipe. I kindly refused his generous offer. He left me the flowers and moved on to the next table. He only offered them a stolen restaurant menu, I felt flattered.

Moving on from the coffee shop I found myself asking for a Lao Massage. Having had my feet and legs pummelled in Hong Kong, stood on and reshaped in Thailand you would think I would have clicked what entails as a massage in Asia. I hadn’t. A Lao Massage isn’t dissimilar to a Thai Massage, both use pressure points- mainly in the feet to warm the body up before an onslaught of punching and pulling to straighten you out. Unlike the Thai massage nobody stood on and walked over my back and legs, instead here in Laos, they crawl on you applying constant pressure with their knuckles, this is teamed with regular pinching and of course a healthy dose of punching. The treatment ends with every possible joint being clicked, from toes and fingers to the more rewarding back and neck. It was less painful than the Thai massage, or perhaps my pain threshold had increased. Either way the 40,000 kip (£3.20) was a steal for a massage, I used to pay my Osteopath £50+ for the same service.

Once back out in the afternoon sun I continued down the main road and towards the many temples. I had little interest on going inside them but they are very photogenic, I walked up a flight of stairs to get a better shot of them but as I climbed more stairs were revealed from behind the trees. I continued my climb until I reached a sign that said “160 steps down, 160 steps up”. To experience the second half you have to pay 20,000 kip, I did and continued climbing. The steps are steep and wide, often requiring three or four strides to move onto the next one. At the top there is a temple, around which panoramic views of the city are offered from every side. This is by far the most stunning viewpoint in the main city. As I walked around the base of the temple I was met by another set of stairs leading back down but on the opposite side to the ones I used to come up. I didn’t have my bearings of the city but was in an exploring mood and so worked by way down. I arrived at another smaller temple which had a number of large statues, one of which was a reclining Buddha, it wasn’t dissimilar to the one I saw in Bangkok with the exception of the crowds, in fact I was the only person in sight. The steep steps eventually brought me into a small hillside village, which at a guess mostly housed monks. The path became more narrow until I was basically walking through peoples front rooms to get down the hill, nobody said anything but I felt awkward and dumb. I came back out onto a path and soon to a final set of stairs which delivered me onto a main road facing a river. I recognised the river, the bridge and even some of the markets and so thought I knew where I was. The heat and the excessive number of stairs had made me eager to get back to the room, that and I should probably check on Hatty.

I turned left and walked along the road for about ten minutes, my brain was ticking all the landmarks off, confirming to me that I did know where I was and that we were heading in the right direction. As I turned the corner I found myself back on the main road, this I knew was wrong. My brain then reminded me that I should have in fact turned right when I got off the hill, I’m a man though and as such I never go back on myself, so instead I decided to walk back into the town where I would turn down an available side street, re-join the original road and head back to the guesthouse. Those who read my Koh Phi Phi blog (sea urchin incident) will know my logic and will also know its usually flawed. As planned I turn down the first side street, follow it round and reach a tall concrete wall, I genuinely contemplated climbing it to avoid walking back on myself but for once I decided to be sensible. Back on the main road I keep walking, arrive at another side street and meet the same concrete fate. As this point it becomes apparent to me that I have two choices, walk back on myself or continue to the staircase, climb the 300 plus stairs up to the temple, back through the village and then down the other side in order to get back on the road to home. More than 600 unnecessary steps and some 50 minutes later I walk back into the room red faced and drenched in sweat.

That evening after some considerable time spent under a cold shower we walked back to the main road in search of an evening meal. Every day from 5pm until late (between 9pm-11pm) the main road fills with market stalls selling the usual selection of Beerlao vests, elephant pants and “traditional” handicrafts, which include Opium pipes and wooden iPhone “speakers”. Although relatively interesting to walk through, there is one main reason people flock here. At the end of the rows of stalls you come to a junction, ahead there is little more than a few shops but to your right is a long and winding food market. The opening stalls offer fruits and sweet items but as you enter the covered market the smells and sights become much more interesting. Large grills and barbeques cooked huge chunks of meat and whole fish, there is everything from entire ducks and chickens to other animals that I didn’t (want to) recognise. Grilled, smoked and fried meats wrapped around long skewers, on the bone or shredded could be purchased from any number of stall, even the less desirable innards were on offer.

None of this looked particularly appetising to my vegetarian companion so we continued deeper into the sweltering, smoky tent. “Buffet, 150,000” a voice hollered at us, nudging a bowl into our hands. I looked up at the mounds of food, stacked some ten dishes along and five dishes high. From rice and noodles to curries and pakoras, every dish was vegetarian so Hatty was in heaven. There was choice a plenty and it all looked great. I piled my bowl high and then topped it off with some of the meat options, grabbed an ice cooled Beerlao and squeezed myself into a space on one of the near-by tables. The food was delicious and ridiculously filling, we finished up and went to pay, less than 50,000 for both meals and drinks, that’s £4 in old money.

As previously mentioned, the visa we had acquired for Laos was only valid for 15 days. Weeks ago when booking our flights to Laos we were very unsure of what to expect when we arrived, we had read about the difficulty of travelling across the country, its lack of a railway and that buses often had armed guards on them. We also knew that we wanted to end up in Hanoi, in the north of Vietnam. As Luang Prabang sits facing Hanoi and flights between the two are relatively cheap we opted to make a week long visit to Luang Prabang and consider that our Laotian experience.  Sitting writing this towards the end of that week I am glad of that decision, this is an outstandingly beautiful city and I’ve loved every minute here. I’ve not killed myself on backbreaking journeys down the country, I’ve certainly not rushed by time here. 15 days would not be long enough to properly see the country, certainly not to do it justice. Instead I’ve familiarised myself with a wonderful city and have been left with the confidence to explore more of this country on a later date. Travelling after all is a marathon not a sprint, something we both learnt the hard way in India.

With Vietnam on our minds we visit a number of travel agents and start getting quotes and processing times for our Visas. We find a small, family run place which offered visas and tours. The lady was really helpful and it wasn’t long before our passports were shipped off to be stamped. We also booked a tuk-tuk for the following day to take us to Kuang Si waterfall, the driver waits for you and then takes you back when you’re done. The guesthouse we are staying at offers a group tour to this waterfall for 300,000 each. For this you get a ride to the waterfall (45 minutes each way) and a limited time to explore and swim in the waterfalls.  We paid 100,000 each. Even with the 20,000 entry fee to the park per person this was still a stinker of deal.

We spent that afternoon is a bar called Utopia. Situated along the Nam Khan river, Utopia is a large Zen like space, the main area is housed in a large open sided bamboo hut, there is a mixture of sofas and triangle pillows turning the floor space into a giant mattress.   http://www.chiangmaicraft.com/thaicushion_2_mattress.asp

There are two garden areas, heavily decorated with tropical plants and with chairs and tables made from tree trunks and old bombs. Continuing down the stone path there is a large decked area which again is furnished with the triangle pillows, all facing out to the river. It is the ultimate chill out area, if the pace of Luang Prabang wasn’t already slow enough for you then Utopia is the place for you to really unwind. Of course if you can muster some energy then you can always play some table football or even make use of the faux beach volleyball court.

The owner is a cool-dude American (Canadian?) and the menu reflects this, offering little in the way of Lao cuisine and concentrating more on big burgers and pizzas. I had the blue cheese and steak burger and it was fantastic.

In fact the food is so good here we returned many, many times throughout out trip. This was the first place in Laos that I tried Fried River Moss, a snack that has fast become a staple for me. My favourite dish on the menu is the spicy papaya salad, its ridiculously flavoursome but I seriously underestimated the “spicy”. I had become cocky as I’d tried some of the hottest dishes that India and Thailand had to offer and had therefore become accustomed the heat. This salad fucked me up.

Many years ago I became transfixed on spicy sauces such as “Blairs Death Sauce”, “Widow Hot Sauce” and “Colon Blow A Red Habanero Enema". These sauces register over 600,000 heat units on the Scoville scale, Tabasco sauce only gets 100 points and a Jalapeño pepper tops out at 5,000 units,  to give it some perspective. There are sauces which are awarded 16,000,000 units but you’ve got to be psychotic to even contemplate putting that on anything you later wish to consume. Anyway, I digress. This fascination led to me purchasing a selection of sauces which I presented to my dad and brother. We did what any self-respecting men would do, we grabbed a serving spoon each and filled its cool metallic surface with the deep red lava from the bottle. I swear the spoon actually fogged up when the sauce hit it. Initially, by that I mean for about the first half a second the experience was enjoyable, by that I mean it wasn’t painful. The furnace that sparked up in my mouth, across my lips, down my throat and into the pit of my stomach lasted for nothing shy of 20 minutes. My eyes streamed so heavily that my vision was reduced to under 5%, I sweated in places I didn’t know I could sweat. The three of us became delusional, hysterical and even experienced mild hallucinations. My two younger sisters watched on, neither impressed nor sympathetic.

I knew at the time it was going to hurt, that I was only doing it for the simple, sinister reason of testing my pain threshold. When I ordered the papaya salad in Utopia I ordered it for the simple reason of being hungry and wanting to enjoy a delicious meal. So you can perhaps imagine my displeasure when I started to experience the symptoms described above, whilst sitting, surrounded by people in temperatures in the high 30’s. Despite the agony I was in there was something very addictive about the dish that kept me returning. I punished myself until every last scrap was gone from my plate. I was glowing red, heat was emitting from me but I felt alive.

Even though Utopia had tried to kill me I kept returning to its tranquil environment time and time again. If you ever come to Luang Prabang then be sure to pay this place a visit.
The following morning our tuk-tuk arrived to take us to the waterfall. Kuang Si park has as you might imagine, a waterfall but it also has a Moon Bear sanctuary, set up by Free The Bears. All the bears have been rescued from poachers who were transporting the bears to sell them to bile farms or food markets. The bile in a Moon Bears gall-bladder is believed to have healing qualities in Chinese medicine. The Chinese also have a taste for the “delicacy”, bear claw soup. Whichever fate the bear faced it only had one ending. Free The Bears works with the bears, getting them back to full health and the future plan is to be able to reintroduce the bears back into the wild. Free The Bears have a number of sanctuaries across South East Asia, one sanctuary in Cambodia sent two of its bears to my local Zoo. Think what you will of Zoo’s but Colchester Zoo is one of the finest in Europe and has done exceptional work in the field of conservation. I saw the two bears when they arrived at the Zoo, tired, thin and afraid. I visited the Zoo last Summer and they are now the picture of health, they are playful and happy. The same success story can be said here in Kuang Si. There are more than ten bears here, they are a large open air area to explore, lots of structures to climb on and lounge in, there is even a stream running through the enclosure. The keepers have devised many interesting ways for the bears to “catch” their food and have built all manor of toys for the bears to keep themselves entertained. They interact well with each other and look very content. Seeing the bears so well treated was amazing. The enclosure is open topped and there is a high viewing platform which gives the illusion of being in there with the bears. It was fascinating to watch them play, laze about and generally be bears. I’d forgotten about the waterfall.
Kuang Si waterfall is astonishing, the turquoise lakes and lagoons at the base of the 200ft waterfall can be swum in and there are routes for trekking to the summit of the waterfall. We started by taking a dip in one of the pools, the water was, shall we say, “refreshing” but once the dangly bits had been submerged it was rather pleasant. It’s difficult to be anything less than happy when in an environment so impressive, nature was properly showing off here and I was truly captivated.

“Oww”, “Ouch!”, “Korrr”, “What was that?” People’s cries filled the air, I became alert and concerned then “Oww” I felt it, “Bah”, and again. I looked down to see a school of little fish nibbling my ankles. They never hurt but they did take you by surprise, every time I jumped a let out a (manly) shriek. The fish are similar to ones found in the foot spas that flooded the high streets a few years ago. Bears, waterfalls and a foot spa treatment not bad at all for £1.60.

We worked our way through the many pools and lagoons, avoiding the fish as best as possible and taking every opportunity to shower under the mighty waterfall. Looking up to the top of the fall was stunning and I knew I had to be up there. We got out, got dressed and started the climb. Hatty is not a confident climber nor does she enjoy climbing but she’s also a good spirit so decided to join me. After about ten minutes of demanding climbing and a couple telling us that you can’t get to the peak she had had enough. She parked herself on a log and I continued on up the face, it was challenging and at times a little hairy but I was determined to see this beast from the top. Not long later the ground levelled out and as I followed the signs through the trees I could see an opening. I was there and the view was monumental. I waded through the knee deep water and as close to the edge as my balls would let me. The volume of the water as it plummeted off the edge of the rock pounded my ears, I peered over the sheer drop unable to see the ground below. In front of me mountains and hills filled the landscape and behind and above me great mounds of vegetation. It was breath-taking.

I’ve slowly been feeling rougher as the weeks gone on, good case of the man-flu on its way, and Hatty has been the same. The common factor is that we’ve both started on our course of anti-malaria tablets. It’s made us both very sluggish, heavy headed and have pretty achy joints, so after yesterdays fun packed adventure we’re both dead to the world. Unable to muster the energy to think of something to do, let alone to do it we settled for dragging our sorry arses into a coffee shop and make a start on our blogs. On the first day this didn’t happen. We found a coffee shop and managed a breakfast and lunch plus numerous drinks, leaving there some six hours later having basically just stared at the ceiling all day. We, for the first time on the trip didn’t go to the night market either. No buffet, I must have been poorly.

The following day was almost as woeful, I did manage to make a start on this blog entry, so I apologise if the opening few paragraphs are shit. Having tried every food and drink option on the menu at Pilgrims we headed to collect our passports, now sporting 30 day Vietnam visas. Returned to the night market and raided the buffet in the hopes of getting our energy levels back.

Our final day in Luang Prabang saw us waking up mildly more enthusiastic but still not ourselves. I’d read about a place, Café de Laos which served siphon coffee. I had no idea what this was but it sounded cool and the coffee had rave reviews. Despite coffee being one of Laos great exports it was hard to get a decent cup, so I was keen (desperate) to find Café de Laos. Siphon coffee simply put is witchcraft. 

First watch this slightly disorientating .gif, and then come back here. 

Did you see how the water defies gravity? Watching the Barista prepare the science experiment was fascinating, watching the water being heated and levitate towards the freshly ground coffee was unnerving and then witnessing the coffee brew itself and then drip feed itself back into the lower chamber for me to pour into my cup was superb. The coffee tasted wonderful and the process of it being made was spectacular. I’ve never been so entertained watching a drink being made. I felt like a kid who’d just seen his very first piece of magic. Better still it made four cups of coffee.

If you’re interested to find out how the magic actually happens then feel free to read self-titled “Coffee Geeks” detailed report on it here http://coffeegeek.com/guides/siphoncoffee .

 The experience, and more likely the caffeine hit had lifted my spirits but I was still feeling groggy and so we returned back to Utopia, stretched out on the bed of cushions, ordered a homemade lemonade and crashed out…

Early flight tomorrow to Hanoi, Vietnam. 
Laos, I will return.


As always thanks for reading.

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