Indonesia Part Four: Ubud, Yogyakarta and some bits in between…

With the 30 hour journey from Labuanbajo to Gili Air still fairly fresh, and having properly adopted the sleepy island life we opted for the fast boat to Ubud, this chopped travel time from 14 hours to 2. We chilled on the top deck, caught some sun and listened to some tunes before catching a mini bus through Bali island until we arrived in Ubud.

Arriving in Ubud I knew I was somewhere good, there was a vibe about the place that instantly grabbed me and I was seriously contemplating extending my visa. I haven’t fallen for a “city” since Chiang Mai, in my mind they are comparable if you see Ubud as its hippy sister. The architecture, Balinese art, coffee shops, food, markets, people and vibrant culture were all fascinating and intoxicating. Just walking from the bus stop to the guesthouse was enough to get me well and truly hooked.

We check into our guesthouse which is unbelievably impressive and set amongst a wilderness of plants and trees, there’s even a waterfall at the bottom of the garden. Our room is elegant and spacious, the front door is ornately carved and a trip to the restaurant makes this place soar in my estimation. A plate of Gado Gado and an avocado smoothie for less than £2.50 yes please.

That evening we take a look at what the city has to offer. No sooner do we reach the end of our road and step onto the main street do the calls from the abundance of taxi drivers begin; “taxi?, taxi?” come the cries from every which way. We wander through the crowd politely saying; “no thank-you” to each and every offer. The calls die down as we approach the palace where a new sound emerges from the crowds, touts selling tickets for tonight show swarm in and begin selling you tickets. At first we decline but before we’ve even crossed the road we change our minds. We take a brief stroll through the night market before returning to the Royal Palace ahead of tonight’s performance.

The evening’s entertainment begins with an introduction to Gamelan music, it sounded like the intro of “Industrial Estate” by “The Fall”, only sped up and played on a series of glockenspiel style instruments, drums, a giant gong and a penny whistle. The music was chaotic and disorientating but had its own disjointed rhythm which was both infectious and infuriating in equal measures.

Act Two saw the beginning of the traditional dance and with the introduction of the princess to the stage the music made more sense. She floated about and controlled the rhythm, her movements where mystical and enchanting but I had little idea what was going on.

She did some squats and waved her fingers around all fancy...

Then her dad and the evil king came in together, which was confusing because they were actually played by two women. The King wants the princess for himself, he kills the dad, the king later dies in battle...

They wave fans at each other, the princess gets out alive.

Enter the Barong, he looks all scary with this sort of bitey mouth and fur but he’s actually really friendly…

He sort of jives about a bit...

Does some wiggles…

Later when he's cool chillin' a monkey comes in...he's all like "I got a banana, want some" and the Barong is like "yeah" and the monkeys is like "lol jokes this is my banana"...The Barong chases the monkey away...

Then these "pretty" ladies come in and do some more dancing and waving of their hands...

These are supposed to represent the side of "good"...

Then a guy comes in who looks like Pavarotti but if Pavarotti was a Bo Selecta character, he’s bad Shamone!

Then we move to a graveyard and these ladies are all under a spell of an evil witch, they have these scary eyes and they are all like "wiggle wiggle"…

Enter evil witch

She casts some spells and hands out blankets which have magical evil powers oooooh

Then she conjures up this spirit thing and even though he's well bad and evil and stuff he's super cute and funny…

The ladies love him. They dance around him and wave their blankets around, saucy…

Then the king is wondering about and he's trying to ignore all the shit that’s going down...

His advisor is like, "you need to have a word with that witch, she's making everyone proper evil and stuff"

So the king goes to the witch doctor and says "can you stop being evil and stuff" and she's like "no"...

Then the super bad but cute thing from earlier comes back but this time he's well hairy and even more adorable...

The lights come up and he does this cool street dance routine, he's all like "have you seen me yo"

Seriously, finger nail game is strong...

But the locals don't much like him so they're all like "ugg" which means they dont like him and they are gonna kill him...

But he is like "raahhh" which means, I dont like you move out my way...then he throws a sheet of cloth at them and then they all become evil and kill themselves then later the good Barong comes in and does a little victory dance. Or at least that’s what I understood from it all...

After all that excitement we walked back to the room and called it a night.

The following morning we woke up with the sun, made our way through the jungle garden and on to a patio area overlooking a waterfall, breakfast came in the form of fruit salad and banana pancakes, an Indonesian staple it seems.

With our bellies full we wander out into the town and window shop until we drop, there is so much to see (and to buy) here, neither of us can decide if coming so late in the trip is a blessing or a curse. From art and handicrafts to furniture, clothes and jewellery there is so much that grabs our attention. Every shop window pulls us in and we mentally fill our imaginary house ten times over with Balinese bits and bobs.

On our third lap of the market we succumb and purchase two small pen and ink drawings of characters from last nights dance, we briefly try to convince ourselves that it would be ok to unlock the credit card and purchase everything from a table to a ten feet painting of a fish but thankfully both came to our senses soon after…A return trip here when we are both rocking healthier bank balances is a definite but for now we can look but can’t touch.

We took a break from the heat at “Grandpa’s”, a small ice cream parlour on the main road. I went for a coconut, mint and avocado smoothie which was served inside the coconut from whence the milk had come, Hatty had a science experiment in a glass- a concoction of soda water, syrups and scoops of ice cream all bubbling away.

As is the theme with Ubud we took to the streets and continued our aimless wandering, there are so many quirky little side alleys and back streets which are all bustling with charming little shops, galleries and café’s it’s hard to pull yourself away.

The next day we took breakfast and then meandered through town, taking a scenic route past the rice paddies. We had a morning to kill because that afternoon we were heading to a Silversmiths to take part in a workshop. We were both given 5 grams of silver and shown techniques on cutting, heating and shaping the silver. Our creations certainly resemble that of a first time silversmith and will kindly make gifts for some loved family members so I won’t say too much more on that part of the experience.

The workshop was located about half hour out of town against a backdrop of rice paddies and rolling hills. We were served local tea and small eats such as banana fritters which I hardly got to sample as Hatty snaffled the lot. The rice paddies were full of ducks, their bum feathers poked out above the green blades and their squabbling quacks made for entertaining viewing. It was an educational and entertaining afternoon.

That evening Hatty’s education continued as I took her to Schwarzenegger school, to show her his more gentle side we watched Commando and despite her laughing at the “daddy montage” at the start of the film, and pretty much every other scene I knew deep down she was impressed with this all action blockbuster.

The following day we did the tourist trail and hit up some of the sites in and around Ubud. We started with the Elephant Cave Temple, or to give it its correct name, Goa Gajah. Set amongst beautiful gardens this temple was a peaceful place to begin the day. The temple itself was small but you do get to walk through the mouth of a god (name escapes me) which was cool in a novelty way. There was also a humongous tree which we were both transfixed with. The French couple we were doing the tour with moved away from us when we started hugging it.

 

Next stop was the Holy Spring Temple; Tampak Siring, as the name suggests there is a holy spring and it was full of people washing and worshipping, it was a little awkward as we couldn’t exactly join in but had to walk past which felt a little voyeuristic. Aside from the main pool there was also a series of pond full of carp and other reflection pools which had loads of intricate and impressive carvings and statues around them, the blues of pool and greys of the stone were offset with bright green, orange, pink and yellow flowers. Like other Indonesian temple complexes this was another beautiful and tranquil place to spend time.

The next stop was to be a real highlight for me, a break from temples took us to a local coffee plantation. A young guy took us on a tour of the farm which was growing ganglion, cinnamon, cloves, pineapple, bananas, cocoa, vanilla and of course coffee. We learnt about the differnet plants, how they are farmed and prepared. We also learnt about a very particular type of coffee which is made here- Luwak Coffee.

The Luwak is a racoon type animal, bigger than a cat but not as big as a badger which has a fondness for the sweet, ripened coffee bean. The Luwak is a fussy eater and only eats the best beans from the plants but no matter how fond this critter is of caffeine its body never properly digests the beans and no when nature takes it cause the beans leave the Luwak whole and end up on the ground.

The farmers then come in and instead of picking the beans from the plant they search for the Luwaks poo, give it a rinse and hey presto they are the finest beans, guaranteed. The shells are cracked open and the beans are gently roasted, short roasting retains higher levels of caffeine while long roasting reduce caffeine but make for a less bitter cup. The end result is a ridiculously smooth and delicious cup of coffee, a full body aroma, a little nutty…pun intended.

We conclude the coffee tour with a tasting of a variety of teas, chocolate and coffee drinks. Bali Coffee, Hot Cocoa, Ginseng Coffee, Vanilla Coffee, Rosella Tea, Ginger Tea, Lemongrass Tea, Coconut Coffee and a prize cup of Luwak Coffee, all washed down with a side of banana chips. Fully refreshed and a little buzzed from drinking five cups of coffee we fly back to the car and onto the next landmark.

A steep ride up hill takes us to a wonderful spot where we view Mt Bahar and Lake Bahar, high up the air is much cooler and the landscape is awe inspiring. Yet again Indonesia offers a beautiful and tranquil spot to unwind, it’s easy to kill time up here watching the clouds floating in the sky covering and uncovering the mountain top, its shadow contorting the world below it. Little homes perch on the edge of the giant rock, its side still blackened from its last explosion no more than fifty years ago.

After lunch we travel to the Mother Temple; Besakih, it’s the most tourist heavy of all the temples and as such invites the scammers and hawkers in flocks. The first of these experiences happens moments after buying your entry ticket, a man in an “official” booth ask for your ticket, saying he must look after it while you enter the temple and as it’s a “special day” you must make a “donation”. None of this is true and with little argument we keep out tickets and move on to the entrance.

The next stage was negotiating the “spiritual guides” who meet you as you approach the main steps leading to the temple. They tell you that you cannot enter the temple without them, which initially seemed legit but then they reveal their cost. We had experienced tricks like this in India and been stung by it so weren’t willing to play along. IT wasn’t long before one guide was following us offering us a “good deal” if we went with him. We looked up at the temple and saw plenty of unguided groups and so decided to continue on our way.

The guide told us we could go up the side steps without him so we did just that, the side steps meet with the main set and so we cut across and into the temple complex. Nobody stopped us and as we met actual clergy along the way they greeted us with a nod and a smile. From the menacing and conniving at the bottom of the steps, here at the top everything had returned back to the traditional beautiful and tranquil attitude that we had come to know and love of Indonesia.

The first part of the temple is interesting, architecturally and from this high vantage point you are offered some cool views back over the city below but the real highlight came from an unexpected find. Together with the French couple we ended up on a rocky lane which took us even higher, it looked like we’d completely left the temple and wandered into a small village when from around the corner we saw what looked like ancient ruins.

There wasn’t a soul up here and the collapsing walls, distorted carvings and rusted fixtures made for an altogether more interesting place to explore. The view back across the temple and city was even better than before and having the place to ourselves made it feel like we’d discovered it. It was a brilliant place to explore and photograph and we soon saw off our allocated time here.

On the way back down to the town we pulled over at a spot on the side of the road which gave us fantastic views of a massive rice terrace, the bright green slope went on for an age before blending into the side of a mountain. You could hear cars tearing around, horns blasting but still, somehow it was, you guessed it, beautiful and tranquil.

The final stop on the tour was the Old Court Jestures of Klungkung Kingdom, a garden-cum-palace-cum-temple. It was pleasant enough but by no means the best of the day, maybe I was getting tired but I wasn’t too interested in spending that much time here. Everyone else was of similar mind so we made our way back to the car and to our guesthouse.

That evening we went out in search of the cheapest way to move on from Ubud to Sanur, a beach spot in Bali. The guesthouse had quoted us 300,00IDR and we tried to barter them down to 150,00IDR their response was to actually laugh in our faces. So you can imagine how smug we were when we walked to Parama Tours office and found out they do a shuttle from Ubud to Sanur for 50,000IDR per person plus 15,000IDR pp for hotel pick up and the same for drop off. As both our departing and arriving hotels were a little way from the bus stop we added this on and paid the total of 160,000IDR.

The bus pulled over and the driver pointed out our hotel, we ran across four lanes of traffic and into the ghostly quiet Harrads Hotel in Sanur. It’s at this point I should mention some facts about this place or more how we came to end up here.

Having almost run out of will power not to buy the whole of Ubud and as we are both permanently in a state of fear that our tans are fading we searched for a part of Bali that would get us back on a beach but away from tanked up Aussies, sports bars and midget wrestling. As it was relatively close to the airport Sanur came out on top. We searched Agoda for a place to stay and a “Star Deal” came up offering a four star hotel with a beach location with a backpacker friendly price tag. The only catch you couldn’t find out what hotel until you complete the booking, we had to go in blind. Totally forgetting the expression, if its too good to be true we clicked OK and thought little more of it.

But as we walked through the deserted hotel hallway things started to click. We arrived at the lobby and woke up two staff, I’m not sure who was more surprised us or them. After a disjointed check in process, a warm glass of concentrated orange juice and being hit in my gentleman sausage by a wild bag handler we were shown to our room.

On first impressions it was large and had all the amenities one expects from a hotel room but once our bags were down we noticed the dust, cigarette butts, stains and other unsightly marks which to us aren’t really an issue, this place still rates as luxury compared to some places we’ve laid our heads down on this trip but it’s certainly not 4 star.

Anyway, we came here with one mission and that was to lounge on the beach. We log onto the WiFi and discover that the beach is over 5km away, as we didn’t fancy the walk down the motorway we went in search of the pool instead. There wasn’t a soul outside, the bar wasn’t stocked, the pool hadn’t been cleaned in its lifetime but the sun was high in the sky and there was a pair of sun loungers with our name on them.

We wrote off the sleepy staff, dirty room and lack of beach and just enjoyed the peace and quiet. We’d certainly been sold a lie of location and star rating but we’d paid so little that we couldn’t really complain. This was about to change when it came to ordering food.

We tracked down a member of staff and asked for a menu, about twenty minutes later someone emerged but instead of coming over to us just stood by the door playing his phone. I took the initiative to ask him if he had a menu, he produced a folded up piece of paper from his pocket with the normal range of Western and Indonesian dishes on it. He quickly informed me that they only had the Indonesian dishes, this isn’t normally a problem but with a vegetation in the house and every item containing Ayem (chicken) things weren’t looking good.

I asked for Nasi Goreng Ayem (Fried Rice with Chicken) but to have it without the chicken. “No have” came the reply. I worked my way through five of the six Indonesian dishes each time asking to exclude the Ayam but each time I got the same answer. However when we reached number six, a chicken and vegetables dish we scored a YES.

We took a seat and waited, about thirty minutes later the staff member came out with two warm glasses of orange juice and told us that the kitchen is closed so the drinks are free but there is no food. We were obviously puzzled how this information hadn’t reached us sooner and wanted to know when the kitchen would be open or if there was a restaurant near by. He gestured over to the rest-room…oh how we laughed.

Sensing that this was a lost cause we went to the reception to enquire about place to eat near by, instead of giving us suggestions they told us to take a seat in their restaurant. We told them that we’d tried to order food but that we were told it was closed, they looked more confused than us and told us to take a seat.

I was starting to get pretty pissed with the situation but wanted to see how this would unfold. We waited for about 15 minutes in an empty and dark restaurant before being greeted by the same staff member as earlier. He didn’t bring over the menu, instead he just recalled our previous order, we nodded and he walked off. I was lost for words, what had just happened!?

My confusion and frustration filled the air and before long the manager came over, he looked suitably nervous. He made no comment on the food but instead asked to take us to see their new roof top pool. He explained that the hotel has recently come under new management and that things were very much in the early stages. We touched on our frustration with the food and staff, he seated us on the roof top and assured us our food would be up soon.

Forty minutes later, or some two hours after originally asking for a menu our food arrived, a portion of rice and a few cabbage leafs. Before I’d even had chance to register what was on my plate the staff member gave me the bill and asked me to pay. Customer service just keeps getting better in this place. I paid the bill of almost £10 and savoured every flavourless mouthful. I was well and truly feeling like I had the word “mug” written on my forehead.

Still, somehow we kept our good temperament, with nothing in the proximity of the hotel to entertain us we went back to the room and exhausted the channels on the TV.

Morning came and we made our way to the restaurant for breakfast, three staff literally ran away and hid behind the counter. We looked around for any hints at how breakfast worked but as the place was in darkness we took a seat outside. The same staff member as yesterday appeared and like a robot repeated our lunch order from yesterday. My calmness vanished, I wasn’t interested in being here for a second more. I asked to speak to the manager, he walked off and we waited.

20 minutes passed and no sign of any one, I less walk more storm into the reception area and demand to speak with the manager. It’s clear from the way he comes out of his office that the staff member never asked for him. I explain to him how unhappy I am with his hotel, his staff, the cleanliness of the room and the complete lack of food available. Seriously could you eat nothing but boiled cabbage three times a day? I explain we are leaving and want a full refund.

Ahmed basically breaks down in front of us, he cant apologise enough and is almost in tears, he asks us what we would like to eat and offers to have it bought to our room. I have absolutely no time for this but Hatty accepts. Totally unaware of the choices available to us we just guess at boiled eggs on toast. We head back to the room, pack our bags and book a new place to stay and ring Agoda to get the refund ball rolling.

The best part of an hour later our breakfast arrives, a cold tea and coffee, four eggs so uncooked they run off the plate and disappear into the unknown, a few slices of partially defrosted bread, a jam substitute and that’s breakfast.

Before we have a chance to be disappointed, Ahmed knocks on the door and asks if he can join us. He wastes no time getting on his knees and begging us to stay, he offers us the suite room, room service, free lifts to any beach or town we want, his gestures get more grand. We explain its too little too late, we’ve booked somewhere else and after breakfast we will be leaving.

I’m not sure if you’ve ever seen a grown man begging on his hands and knees but let me tell you it is seriously uncomfortable. He agreed to the full refund but continued to offer us upgrade after upgrade but we weren’t biting it. We spoke to Agoda together and the refund was sorted.

Breakfast was so inedible by this stage that we left it, took our bags down to reception and ordered a taxi. Ahmed appeared and said he would take us to our next hotel free of charge. Purely for how awkward that journey would be we declined and said we’d just book a taxi but he insisted.

On the thirty minute car ride he told us that he’d only been the manager for three weeks, the last manager had stolen three billion Rupiah from the hotel (that’s a little over £150,000), as a result the owner of the hotel didn’t have any money to give to Ahmed for things like wages or stock, he was told he would need to make that money from sales of the rooms. The staff hadn’t been paid for three months and hadn’t received tips for over five months. Things very quickly made sense but no matter how dire it all sounded for Ahmed the guy still had a cracking sense of humour. He told us about his family, about his younger more studly days, he was hilarious but he was on the verge of a very big breakdown one which we were inevitably going to be partly responsible for but as heartless as it sounds we couldn’t help him.

As we approached our new hotel he asked if we could let him into our room so he could see how it differed from his hotel, we persuaded him that this wouldn’t be a good idea but did agree to go undercover and take photos of the room, amenities and food for him. As pitiful as that hotel was it was humbling to learn the backstory, I felt like a proper prick complaining about the lack of food when the person serving me hadn’t been paid in three months, speaking to Ahmed grounded me and put life into perspective.

After a heart-warming journey we said goodbye to Ahmed and hello to our old friends at Hotel Horison in Nusa Dua. Just like our last visit here we had one main ambition, to lay by the pool, soak up some sun and do a good stint of proper fuck all. Aside from eating and lounging we managed to watch an entire season of Sons of Anarchy and I had a lovely Face Time session with my brother who is currently living in New Zealand. But I can’t lie, we went full lazy and we’re proud.

After three days of total R&R we woke up 5.30am for our flight to Yogyakarta.

We’d heard Yogyakarta was a bit of shit hole, we’d even read cases of it being dangerous, car bombs, pick pockets and other fearful accounts. Fair enough Yoggy was a bit of dump, boarded up shop fronts, shanty style houses, usual piles of litter burning on the roadside and stray dogs running about but nothing out of the ordinary. But as much as I might be able to agree that it’s tired one thing I cannot agree with it that its dangerous, the people of Yogyakarta from airport staff, bus drivers, people on the street and everyone else in between are without a doubt the friendliest I’ve ever met. That’s more friendly than the Cambodians, Filipinos and even other Indonesians, something I didn’t think was possible.

Everyone we walked past had a smile, gave a wave, said hello. When we struggled to find the road our guesthouse was on there was no shortage of people willing to help, when we travelled into the town people helped us find different landmarks, everyone was welcoming, genuine and most definetly not dangerous.

There are signs of trouble having happened here, so I’m sure my visit is just well timed but whatever has happened it’s not knocked the moral of the people, there isn’t a wild amount to do in this city but come for the people, a day in their company is good for the soul.

After being unimpressed with the sites we went in search of some grub, being Ramadan our options were limited but on our way to the Water Palace we found a tiny hawker stall and scored big. The owner was, in true Yogyakarta fashion delightfully friendly and full of conversation. We picked out the foods (and quantities) that we wanted, we teamed our mound of food with a hot cup of hibiscus tea. I was full to bursting and had enjoyed a delicious meal and some quality conversation so couldn’t believe the bill which came in at less than 50p each.

The following morning arrived and an hour before our 3.30am alarm could go off we were up thanks to the call to prayer. We joined the family for their pre-sunlight breakfast and a bit before 4am got in the car and drove to Borobodur Temple.

The park doesn’t open until 6am but if you pay the on sight hotel a small fee you can enter the park in time for sunrise. Paying this fee was a no brainer for us, we got given a torch each and found our way to the temple, climbed most of the way up and chose a spot and waited for the sun to start the day. Sitting surrounded by giant Stupas atop a 9^th Century temple watching the sunrise from behind Mt Merapi quickly became one of the most magical mornings of my life.

With each moment the light revealed more of our surrounding, large Buddha’s, intricate reliefs and yet more mountains in the distance. It took us about five hours to walk around the whole temple and although it didn’t overtake Bayan or Ta Phrom as my favourite of the trip its high up there.

Talking of height, when we were on the tenth level about to reach enlightenment Hatty tried to cuddle a bee and ended up with its stinger in her arm. Credit to her she didn’t freak out but once I’d removed the stinger her body did what comes naturally to it which is feel faint. I got her sat down and away from the edge and again, credit to her she didn’t faint or throw up. We did obstruct some Chinese tourists taking selfies with Buddha but I’m sure they’ll get over it. We slowly made our way down to the bottom, did a whistle stop tour of the museums and then got back in the car.   

The next morning we caught an early bus to the airport and then a flight to Jakarta, another to Singapore and a final one to Colombo in Sri Lanka, where my next entry picks up from…

As always thanks for reading.